If you’ve noticed that the men in your life seem more reluctant to seek therapy than the women, you’re picking up on something real. Men are consistently less likely to seek mental health support, even when they’re struggling just as much — and understanding why can be the first step toward changing it.
Why men are less likely to seek help
A few patterns show up again and again:
- Cultural messaging around strength and self-reliance. Many men are raised with the idea that asking for help is a sign of weakness rather than a normal part of being human.
- Fewer permissions to name emotional struggle. Men often aren’t given the same language or space growing up to talk about what they’re feeling, which can make it harder to even recognize when something is wrong, let alone ask for support.
- Concerns about how therapy will be perceived. Worries about seeming “less capable” at work, with a partner, or within a friend group can keep men from reaching out even when they want to.
- Different symptom presentation. Men’s struggles with anxiety or depression sometimes show up as irritability, anger, or overworking rather than sadness or worry — patterns that are easy to miss or misread, by others and by men themselves.
The cost of waiting
The suicide rate among men in 2024 was nearly four times higher than the rate among women, according to the CDC — despite men reporting depression less often than women. This gap is one that many researchers attribute in part to reduced help-seeking and later intervention. This isn’t meant to alarm, but to underline that the reluctance to seek support has real consequences, and starting sooner rather than later genuinely matters.
Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Suicide Data and Statistics (2026)
If you or someone you know is struggling, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call or text 988) offers free, confidential support 24/7.
What makes it easier for men to take the first step
- Finding a therapist who specifically understands and works with men’s issues, rather than a generalist approach
- Framing therapy as a tool for performance and clarity — the same way an athlete works with a coach — rather than only as treatment for something “wrong”
- Starting with a specific, practical goal (a career transition, a relationship conflict) rather than needing to have everything figured out first
- Knowing that therapy doesn’t require being highly verbal or emotionally fluent from day one — that’s part of what the process helps build
Support built specifically for men’s experiences
At Legacy, Dr. Van Meter works specifically with men navigating identity, purpose, relationships, and career transitions across every stage of life — from college through the years approaching retirement. If you’re a man considering therapy for the first time, request a consultation to talk through what that could look like for you.
Content developed with editorial review by our clinical team.